My teeny weeny issue..

Okay, so I have this teeny weeny problem.. My weight, and for 22 years, I’m still not happy about it. Oh God, how long will my anxiety eat up my life??? It’s a sensitive issue for me, even thinking about it makes me depressed already L As long as I have lived I’ve managed to lose 20 kilos.. another 10kg would make me “an ideal weight” person. However, this 10kg is even more annoying than a zit! Because at least zits subside with time and proper treatment, but it’s not working for me that way! I have improved in my health in other ways, like, uhm, stamina, strength, but my figure and weight is not going anywhere!! Even with only muesli and healthy veg in my diet, I’m still stuck! And because of that I end up wallowing in comfort food..yes, rich food…talk about chocolates, hey but I know my limits.. and I don’t do it daily.. so what’s missing ? What’s causing my weight to hold back?? I really don’t know..

I just don’t understand how hot girls who just sit their asses off in their room, feeding on internet and sleep could actually maintain that firm figure.. where as me, the moment I run, I’m like a wobbling jelly from Gummy Bear land! I seriously don’t get it.. I do 60 sit ups twice daily, half an hour of stretch, and half an hour of jogging.. and my weight is still going nowhere but 60kg! L

I know it’s not exactly a good thing to compare yourselves to others and that you should be happy in whatever you seem to be.. but hey, 22 years of this, obviously I’m meant to get frustrated at some point right? Sigh…. Maybe it’s my love for cooking.. they say thinking about food itself causes weight gain, you know.. then again, my passion does lie in food, and almost everyone who knows me knows that.. L sigh..

Need to let go.. of which, the weight issue or the cooking..?